My Pity Party

Yesterday, I was feeling very sorry for myself. I love holidays with my family. My mom goes out of her way to make everything beautiful and yummy. We eat a lot, watch Christmas movies, and look through all the Black Friday ads. Often, we spend Thanksgiving at the beach, which is my favorite!

This year, we were going to be with my hubby's family. We haven't been with his family for any holidays for nine years! It's always been too expensive to fly during thanksgiving or Christmas.
So, now that we are locals, it's finally their turn.

At the last minute, the family decided to go out of town. They had their reasons, and we understood. We couldn't go, so, here we are, alone. Hubby has been working in his home town, and had to work the day before and after the holiday, so we weren't even home alone in our house, we were alone at his Dad's house. At least for me, it was not the most ideal of circumstances.

Hub's childhood best friends invited us to their home for dinner. They are very kind and generous people and we had a good time.

Still, it wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to be with my family, and if I couldn't then at least it was because I was being a kind wife and sacrificing to be with his family. Now, neither applied and that just stinks!

I tried to shake my bad mood all day. I mean, I realize I have nothing to complain about. I get to eat more food today than most people in the world will eat for an entire week. I have a home, clothes, and family.

My mind knew these facts, but my soul still wanted to pout.

Then, a face book post snapped me out of my self pity state. The post was a link to a blog about a little boy who is dying of cancer. His body is shutting down, and this will be his last Thanksgiving.

The blog linked was shared by a man who has every reason in the world to complain, but, at least in my interactions with him, rarely does. His daughter is in remission from cancer. His wife is dying of ALS. This, too, may be her last Thanksgiving.

The truth is, I am blessed beyond measure and reason. I have nothing, ever, to really complain about, and in all things I should give thanks.

Thank YOU, LORD, for all your goodness, kindness, and mercy, that you have shown to me and my family. Forgive my grumbling and complaining spirit.

You want me to do what?

Throughout the Body of Christ, God is restoring the arts. Creativity and Expression are gifts from the Father. The ability to paint, draw, write songs, poetry, play music, all are reflections of His heart. Beautiful worship presented at His feet.

I appreciate this movement. But, this is one river of the spirit I don't tend to wade into.

However, on Wednesday, our class assignment was to write a song or poem. WHAT? I don't think so. Quickly after, I put it out of my mind. Teasing at home that I would have my creative daughter do the assignment for me.

Then today, when riding in the car, watching her giggle, seeing her birth mom's features shine through, the Lord put a poem in my heart. It is not fancy or well done, but it will pass for the assignment.

Abba’s Gift

You are present in every giggle,
Each smile, a reflection, personal.

A twinkling eye beaming forth a story of grace,
Your selfless love shining through her face.

An earthly portrait of an Eternal mystery.
Adoption, Abba’s gift to me.